Hey, Chris, I have a fat loss question for you, but I also have some stipulations on it! The question is, why do I have to lift weights to lose fat? Why can’t I just walk? And the stipulations are, I zone out when you talk all sciencey, so make it stupid simple. And I like when you’re passive aggressive, so sprinkle some of that in there, too.
Oliver Wendell Douglas
Greenacres, Florida
Howdy, Mr. Douglas, your simple question is a robust one that can take us in a lot of different directions, but in consideration of your request, simple will be the name of the game. Question for you: if you’re from a simple town, does that make you a simpleton? (Sorry, you asked for passive aggressiveness.)
Imagine you’re a Care Bear; you’ve got a big smile pinned on your face 24/7 and a belly badge that can light up and shoot magical beams of sunshine and rainbows. That belly badge is your metabolism. The brighter it is, the more efficient it is and the leaner you are. There’s only one way to keep that belly badge bright, and that is getting together with other Care Bears and singing songs. Those songs are like lifting weights and building muscle. If you sing songs (build muscle/weightlifting) you can keep your belly badge (metabolism) bright.
As a Care Bear, there are a lot of things you can do with your bright belly badge. You can go for walks, you can go for jogs, you can make healthy snacks in your stomach and beam them out to all the boys and girls; but you need to make sure to get together with other Care Bears and recharge that belly badge, otherwise it’s light will dim, and you’ll lose your magic Care Bear powers.
Now, there’s a lot of confusion in the world. Mr. Peloton is on television telling the Care Bears that he can charge up their belly badges with his secret formula. Other whispers in the magical forest are claiming that walking or jogging around the woods will do it. There’s even some jerk-off selling resistance band sets on television telling the Care Bears that is all they really need. The Care Bears aren’t stupid, though; they know that unless they get together and sing songs (build muscle/weightlifting), their belly badges will dim to black.
That’s pretty cut and dry. Care Bears love to partake in all different activities, but unless they get together and sing songs with other Care Bears, they fade out and die. People love to partake in all different activities, but unless they lift weights (and eat healthy), eventually their light dims out, they trade in their badge for just a belly, and before their time, they die. I find that unbearable.
About the author
Chris Rombola
Chris is the owner of Fit House. He's run the training departments at several commercial gyms, and after years of seeing how awful those environments were for his clients, he opened his own studio. He is devoted to getting people strong, lean, and healthy.
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